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Why Do So Many Go Into a Marriage For the Wrong Reasons

Why Do So Many Go Into a Marriage For the Wrong ReasonsFace it. Many of us go into marriage without truly thinking it through. We all have a self-protective mechanism, and most of us will do whatever it takes to feel safe. If we were raised in healthy environments, and developed the ability to have honest relationships with other people, we usually make healthy decisions.

However, some of us, for one reason or another, have trouble making a commitment for the right reasons. Because marriage is supposed to be “forever,” it’s one of the most important commitments. Yet so many of us enter marriage for the wrong reasons. Here are some bad reasons why people get married, and some common marriage problems that can occur as a result.

 

  1. Afraid of being alone. According to Elite Daily, many individuals are sad and incredibly lonely. We all feel this way from time to time. As a result, “ Sadness is your mind notifying itself that it needs an emotional void filled. The problem most come to face in such situations is believing that void can be filled with any individual.”

In other words, the next person to pay you any sort of attention is not the person to marry or start a relationship with. First, you have to understand why you are lonely and sad. What is the void missing in your life? Start getting comfortable being alone first. Then do some soul searching and figure out who you are and what you really want. Don’t enter a relationship simply because you will be alone. It will end up making you feel even lonelier in the long run.

 

  1. It’s the next step. Perhaps you’ve been together since high school, and the logical next step is to get married. Or maybe you have a child together, and the child keeps asking when mom and dad are getting hitched. Secretly though, you still want to travel, date other people, or live your life a little.

The Huffington Post argues that, “the length of a relationship is not a measure of its long term success.” More pertinently, just because you’ve been together “forever” does not mean you need to get married. Maybe you’re in the relationship for the wrong reasons. Taking the “next step” is only going to amplify those wrong reasons.

 

  1. Money. Perhaps you are in debt. Maybe you found someone who could help pay off that loan you took out. Or maybe you are afraid of supporting yourself, and are looking for a better life.

The old adage “Money can’t buy happiness” is just as true now as it always was. Yes, money and financial stability in a marriage can make things easier. It can allow you to have more freedom, and you can provide your children the opportunities you didn’t have. But if there is not a solid foundation for the marriage, marrying for money is one of the primary things to be cautious about before marriage.

There are many false reasons for marriage, and certain red flags before marriage that should raise your eyebrow. If you truly love your partner and see yourself building a life with them, through richer or poorer, till death do you part, then you are marrying for the right reasons.

Everyone wants to find stability. It’s often the primary reason why people rush marriage. But it’s not enough of a reason to take that vow. It will only create more problems later on, and perhaps lead to a divorce. If you want a happy marriage, marry for the right reasons, and make sure you know what you’re looking for in a partner.


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