There’s been a lot of celebrity divorce in the last year or so. Blake Shelton and Miranda Lambert, Gwen Stefani and Gavin Rossdale, Reba McEntire and Narvel Blackstock, Johnny Depp and Amber Heard, Ben Affleck, and Jennifer Garners, heck, even Kermit the Frog and Miss Piggy called it quits. So how did they know it was the best time to divorce? The truth of the matter is that much of the time, the parties involved have already been separated for a time before their split is announced.
Much of Hollywood still runs on the myth that the best time to announce a celebrity divorce is on Friday in hopes the news will have died by Monday. The divorce process and the emotions surrounding it can be amplified by all the gossip and chatter that come with the announcement of a split.
At the end of the day, celebrities are people too, and they get divorced for the same reasons we do. The main difference is that their divorce process is a public affair which is probably part of the reason for the split in the first place.
Why So Much Celebrity Divorce?
Contrary to popular belief, celebrity divorce is usually not a publicity stunt. Other than the common reasons for divorce, these are worthy to note among celebrities:
- Reality sets in – Just like us, celebrities can develop crushes and become infatuated with the image a person portrays online or in the media. Once you are married, you see the real person behind that facade. If that person is different than the image, problems arise
- Busy schedule – Hollywood schedules have no regard for anyone, much less a celebrity’s spouse or family. Over time, this can become grounds for divorce
- Temptation – People throw themselves at celebrities, so temptations can run higher and fidelity is also at a higher risk. Not to mention, the nature of a celebrity’s job. Does your job require that you kiss your co-worker? Probably not
- Narcissism – When large numbers of people are constantly singing your praises, that can quickly go to one’s head. Sometimes that can translate into condescension or thinking one treats their significant other better than they really do
Ways to Know It’s Time To Divorce
So how do you know when to get a divorce? Obviously, it’s going to vary from couple to couple, but consider these:
- You feel criticized or put down – This is one of the main reasons that marriages dissolve
- You are defensive with your partner – It’s hard to be vulnerable in the first place, but when you do, you regret that you were
- Putting the children first – This is a common mistake. When both parties involved are focused on the children, only the children’s needs are being met. You end up with resentment in the relationship and selfish, maladjusted kids
- You don’t like each other’s friends/families - No rational person is going to ditch their friends and family for their relationship, so if you’re not elated to be with these extensions of your partner and vice versa, that’s a problem
- You feel alone even when you’re with your partner – As a result, your relationship will suffer because you aren’t sharing as much closeness and intimacy
- Your sexual needs differ greatly – This a bad sign all the way around because intimacy is the glue that holds a marriage together
- You are in a pursuer-distancer pattern – One of you is seeking to be closer with the other while the other is searching for ways to be more distant
- You argue about the same things over and over – Your disagreements are never resolved, so you argue about the same issues all the time
Any one of these is a red flag, and if you are suffering from more than one, your marriage is in serious trouble. You have two options:
- Seek professional help from a marriage counselor
- Call it quits
It is certainly our hope that you can work things out, but if you can’t, we hope you will find the help you need here with us. We’d love to hear from you in the comments.